As in the song ‘River’, “I wish I had a river I could skate away on” Away! Away, until reaching that point where it becomes unnecessary to slide the skates across the iced-over river. Some days are like this. I want to skate away feeling the air’s brisk friction on my face and only hearing the sound of my breathing in and out. Simplistic abandonment. The undeniable liberty I might feel should I allow myself to skate away even for a brief moment. But as beaconing as this might be reality does keep me grounded in the life I have chosen to lead. Still, there is need for change.
It is not that I want to leave my life completely behind but I do want to make fundamental changes to it. Not at warp speed but rather at a steady and easy pace otherwise it would be too uncomfortable for me to handle, then I would have to find an icy river and a pair of skates.
The thing is this: I would rather do my own thing 100% of the time. I know it must have something to do with turning 65, collecting my social security check; receiving Medicare and no longer being responsible for my mother’s care but I just don’t want to be told what I can and can not do any longer. I want to decide and I want to decide all the time. I don’t even want the time I wake up in the morning to be dictated by an hourly wage I must earn nor do I want to skip an afternoon nap because my fanny is glued to a desk chair miles away from my home. Does this mean I am ready for total retirement? I think not. I am ready to call my own shots though and not punch a time clock. I am ready for independence from the daily grind. Therefore, I have begun to think outside the box. Want do I want to do with the remaining thirty-odd years of my life? Like I wrote before steady and easy are my proven safe and sound mode of operation so there is no need to rush things. With that said: It is time to begin to put things into action for my future liberty. I might even buy that pair of skates.